Aisha's Lamenting

Aisha begun to wonder why he changed? Unlike him, her feelings toward him intensely increasing. Everyday she dreamt of being close to him. She’d email him, call him and messaging him, but he chose to keep distance. Not a message, neither a call from him which left her wondering why. Perhaps, she had overdone it. Perhaps, she has exaggerated it. Perhaps, he doesn’t really like her at all.

It has been awhile since she sat there. About a couple of hours ago, she decided to go up there and ponder. Not a single word came out from her mouth but tears kept flowing from her eyes. She couldn’t find any reason why she’s crying, maybe her heart is crying and her eyes console. She wanted to stop but it is hurting her even more. The beat of her heart sounds too loud. She couldn’t hear anything else but her broken heart.

“Whatever pain I am feeling right now is so shallow for me to understand what it truly means. I have no f****g right to feel this and be this way. This feeling of solitude perhaps made me linger to that sort of belongingness I considerably tried to put on him. He misses to distinguish all the time which pains me more because I am feeling disregarded. I wish I knew what’s on his mind so I may know where to place myself. I hated this part of me. It’s annoying. I’m always the loser.”

She cried.